Waking and sleeping in the same location? Check.
Not having to drive anywhere? Check.
Resort full of family-friendly activities? Double check.
The scene is set for an epic day at Rocking Horse Ranch – though perhaps too epic.
It’s 7 am and the alarm has just gone off. I’m staring at my phone because I did not get enough sleep last night. Nor the night before, or the night before that. But I can’t go back to bed, because I need to be at the stables in less than an hour.
Big sigh, and I heave myself out of bed.
Twenty minutes later, my daughter and I are sitting near the refreshment station. I’m having coffee, and she’s having hot chocolate. There’s some sort of a nut-based sweet loaf on offer, but it’s not her taste – I manage a few mouthfuls, and that’s plenty for this hour of the day.
Off to the stables. They’ve got a row of helmets all laid out. My daughter has her own. We stand hopefully in the “advanced” line, hoping to get the nod.
Each advanced rider needs to undertake an assessment in which they have to canter uphill without holding on to the saddle – while riding Western. Each stable seems to have its own view of what constitutes ‘proper riding’, and it’s maddeningly different from one to the next.
Ah, well. Their house, their rules.
We line up – beginner, intermediate, and advanced. Cue the assessment.
I’ve cantered before, but this whole “don’t hold onto the saddle” piece is new to me.
No time to think about it, though – because we’re off and away. The uphill element definitely throws a new wrinkle into the works, and I soon feel as though I’m being battered against the saddle.
My daughter unfortunately got downchecked to intermediate. It took a little bit for her to get her horse to canter – though she had vastly better form than I did, and she managed the steepest section of the hill. But it wasn’t the full run, so back to intermediate we go.
My daughter is of the opinion that they were looking for a reason to send her back down – and I can see why they might want to limit the “advanced” riders to young adults and older, or those whom they’ve seen ride previously. The youngest to make the cut was at least 15, and she owns her own horse and rides competitively.
The staff are kind about it. They offer us the chance to reattempt next round. They note that some horses are better suited to cantering than others.
My daughter is disappointed, but I feel as though my prayers have been answered.
Our group spends most of its time trotting – which I find challenging but manageable – and enjoying the stunning forest scenery:
As my wife pointed out, please note that no photographs are permitted! I somehow missed this despite it being mentioned in the waiver, during the initial briefing, and again as we were heading out… selective hearing strikes again
It passes quickly, and we return to the stables shortly after 9 am. Tempted as we are to ride again, there’s simply too much to do today.
My wife did manage to get one of the approved photographs, as in one taken by someone not actively riding a horse:
Off to breakfast, where I finally get some eggs made to order:
I also try one of their biscuits, and it is delicious.
Here’s today’s schedule:
My son and I start with a visit to the range. The archery portion doesn’t hold our attention for terribly long – not when there’s a shooting gallery on offer:
The guns use BBs and simple iron sights, but there’s a range of targets to hit, from small disks to cowbells and horseshoes. Safety goggles are required.
We then stop for a brief game of giant checkers:
And then we’re off to the banana boat again. I do a single round without falling off, but the kids ride it again, and again, and again.
My wife and I find another shady spot by the pool, and settle in to read for a while. And so the day passes – my son and daughter alternating their time between the banana boat, laser tag, and bungee trampoline.
Lunchtime arrives. It’s an outdoor barbeque today:
The food is the same as what they’ve served at the indoor lunches – hot dogs, roast chicken, fries, and so on. The upside of dining outside is that there’s no need to change out of bathing suits.
We also get to enjoy some of the Ranch’s massive tree cover:
One of the upsides of the property being around since the late 1950s. (The bolt-on airconditioners? Not so much.)
The rest of the grounds are beautiful too. My wife takes some time to wander around and snap a few more shots:
Meanwhile, I’ve also been trying to get the car in for one more charge. This was challenging the previous night, as there were several non-charging cars parked in the space, along with one of the Ranch’s trucks.
It wasn’t much better this morning:
The Ranch has just about managed to block two spaces, but there’s still one free.
Even the highland cattle is unimpressed:
(To their credit, the front desk did start calling the charger-hogs the previous night, shortly after I raised it with them. I was then able to charge to 93%. I then decided to top up to 100% today so as to shorten the stops on departure day.)
Back to the pool, and back to our books. The kids return to their activities, each of them having made new friends. It’s an immensely pleasant way to spend a day.
Around 3 pm, the Chef’s Tasting rolls out. This time the pretzel bites are hot and freshly made. The drink of the day is a ‘Dirty Shirley’ – a Shirley Temple with vodka in it, I believe.
One last round of mini golf around 5 pm:
Then it’s time for a shower before dinner.
Tonight’s menu:
Caesar salad this evening (not pictured), and none of us bothered with appetizers.
My wife got the salmon for dinner:
While I had the tortellini:
My son opted for chicken fingers again, while my daughter had just the macaroni and cheese (not pictured).
I reattempted making my own soft serve ice cream, this time with much better results:
I wish I had the photo of the first attempt. There were huge globs of ice cream hanging to either side. It was only quick action on my part that prevented it from making a massive mess. The trick is to slowly lower the lever, rather than pulling it right down to the bottom.
Back to the room for a bit, where we packed up to the extent possible. We loaded a few of the bags in the car, so that we won’t have as much to do tomorrow morning.
My son and daughter went off for one last round of laser tag, and then headed down to the Silverado Saloon for tonight’s comedy show, a reprise of Mark and Baker.
Or so we thought – turns out that tonight’s show is actually “The Fast and the Victorious”, a speed-based gameshow in which half the audience (the red team) faced off against the other half (the blue team) in a range of reaction tests, memory challenges and trivia:
Some of it seemed a bit bizarre – like the extended battle of the Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots – while others, like the trivia, seemed a lot more interesting. The audience seemed to really enjoy all of it, though, so that’s what matters.
(We did recheck the schedule – apparently the first version had an error in it. Tonight was family game show night with Eric Dasher.)
Then off to bed – we have an early start tomorrow as we attempt to beat the weekend traffic to the Canadian border.